Saturday, March 28, 2009

How can you love your body?

I was leisurely captivated by a starless night when, in delicately turning a cloud, my elbow weighed on a remote control which gave the floor very loudly to a television with which I still share my dining room. I jumped out at this creature of Sony to muzzle it, but an indignation lacerated the cool silence, shrieked by the image of a woman looming out of what I thought I saw was a discussion on breast enlargement: "How can you love your body if you don't feel loved!"

The silence rapidly regained control but I could not escape from overtime as this resonating byword continued to bellow in my head: How can you love your body if you don't feel loved! There was no way out, I had to resign myself to the ordeal of sudden death: How can you love your body if you don't feel loved!

I thus confronted the intruder, and I do not regret it, for I had never approached such a digest of fundamentals! Ah, I think I've found a pearl! I will have a jeweller examine it in the coming days, but it is already clear that I have struck a bargain. What we have here is undoubtedly a masterpiece of contemporary art: How can you love your body if you don't feel loved!?

First there is this splendid "how". The artist has not skimped with an unfit why, he exclusively used noble materials, giving immediately the means to the largest number to lounge in a sumptuous: How would you like your steak honey, rare, medium or well done? Which obviously waters the mouth of the aesthetic butchery.

Then comes the expression "can you" which is the signature stamp of modern times. Only the nitwit wants, these days each and everyone can! This is very important because the how and the can do away once and for all with the why and the want. These days we can more and more, and it is increasingly less worth it to want.

Then we penetrate into the thick of things: we postulate that we love our body more than anything ("How can you love your body!") and it is after this paroxysmal pause that the reclamation at last manifests itself ("if you don't feel loved!").

- Do you feel how I love you?
- Um... no!
- And there for example, do you feel it better?
- No, I don't feel a thing!!!
- Ok and there?
- The cheek!!!
- Well what then, do you want to feel like I love you or do you not? Smile

I'm sorry but I don't understand why the verb to feel is not in the first part of the sentence: How can you love your body if you don't feel loved! There's no reason why everybody can't feel everything right from the start, why wait? But it may also just be a question of information and communication, well of organisation and synergy of skills: How can you love your body if you are not informed you are loved! That's it basically, synergy of skills and transfer of information between the one who loves and the one who is loved, we can't do everything at once, to love and to be loved, and we aren't either necessarily informed of everything at each moment!

Pfff, no, that's not it either, it's not so simple, for how will we feel we are informed that we can feel we are loved??? Ah yes, that's a responsible policy which gives concrete answers and not ideal and platonic forms, because we say things, but in practice nobody holds their promises!

Honestly if I were a TV show host to the question "How can you love your body if you don't feel loved?" I would have answered: "I prefer not to say anything nonsensical, and the answer is no."

So I know you well enough, you will tell me that there was no question and that the lady thundered an indignation, not at all an interrogation, but you know why I would still answer this? Can you imagine a nice looking and intelligent young girl venting such a stupidity: "How can you love your body if you don't feel loved? Don't you see the ball b... running towards you from 100 yards out "And what do I do to feel someone loves me if I am ugly and stupid? I'm not even asking to be loved, but at least that somebody makes me believe it, so I can feel what it does to those who are loved for real!

Yes, ok, you've already mentioned this, I am not deaf. There was no question, I nonetheless answered and it may very well be that I spoiled something. Well, ok, I admit it then, I spoiled something, but me, with experience, there are things I prefer to spoil, ya never know.


  1. A very good writing for me to read on Monday morning.

    Good writing to make me place more importance on my body :)

  2. Big questions on a Monday morning. I know if I were a TV gameshow host and asked: "How can you love your body if you don't feel loved?" I would have answered: "A brand new car!"

    Ah, Mondays...

  3. "How can you love your body if someone lied and said they love you?" "What if you won't love your body even if someone does love you?" "What is love?" "What does body have to do with it?"

    So many questions, so little time. :)

  4. Thanks guys, haha.

    Alan: A brand new car is good for self esteem!

    Jamie: I do think love has more to do with the soul/substance than with the body. :)

    Boy, I sometimes wonder where Avatar got his vivid imagination from. :D

  5. By the way, did anyone read the label on this post:Sarcasm.Count Sneaky

  6. If a body meet a body comin' thru the rye...Rye Whiskey, rye whiskey, I'll drink it 'til I die...Then I'll meet my body comin' thru the rye. Apologies to Robert Burns. Count Sneaky

  7. CS,
    hehe ;)
    PS I thought that was Sarcasmborglike :D

  8. If you could send me a brand new car in the mail that would indeed lift my self esteem. Thanks! I'll keep an eye out for the postman.

  9. Alan,
    At the Being&Quirkiness locale, there are a number of small keys, but I'm afraid none of them were forged in view of life in the fast lane - hopefully there are other ways to turbo boost esteem ;)

  10. Oh, I did mean to mention in my last comment, I know one enlightened person, the Baron de le Boehn, who loved himself quite often. And now, he must employ a seeing eye dog, whom he also finds quite lovable. In fact, they were recently arrested for public display of affectations. Count Sneaky

  11. CS,
    If all those who have an idealistico-affectionate rapport with their pet should be arrested, another Australia would have to be discovered. :)

  12. For a public display of AFFECTATIONS?

  13. CS,
    hehe, I misread that last word. The sentence takes on a whole new meaning ;)

  14. What a difference a few letters make. "How can you love your body if you don't feel loved". WOW,what of a question? I believe strongly that love is a verb. Love is what you do and are willing to do for someone or something, love is not a feeling.

    With every action there is a reaction (I'm not sure if always opposite). When I am conscious of someone love for me I feel grateful, safe, happy, and loving. So love exchanged, whether received or expressed, causes feeling especially when the giver and receiver are conscious of it. So I do feel love but not with every exchange.

    "How can you love your body?"...You love your body when you take care of your body. You can love your body by feeding it, bathing it, dressing it, providing shelter for it. When you love your body it may cause feelings of gratitude, pride, and confidence. You can love your body and still harm your body, consciously or subconsciously. You can go days without sleep (subconsciously) or you can cut my wrist (consciously) but when you eat you are loving your body.

    "How can you love your body when you don't feel loved?"... Loving our body is a an innate reflex. When a baby comes into this world they cry when their body needs something. They don't have to learn to cry, they have to learn the the connection between crying and getting their needs meet; they have to cry to let someone know that they need love. When the baby learns that crying gets their needs meet they are able to love their body. They consciously do something so that their body is taken care of.

    Our bodies learn to love themselves with or without feeling loved. We love our bodies innately and then learn to love are bodies independent of others help as we mature. Love is a reflex, but love is also a skill that gets developed as we learn what are bodies need. A five year old can learn to make a sandwich a twenty year old can learn to cook a nutritious and balanced meal.

    "How can we love our bodies when we don't feel loved?" Easily. We come into this world loving our bodies. What is more difficult is maintaining hate for our bodies. Because of hardships some people have feeling of hate fro their body, but to hate your body requires discipline. You must train yourself and your body to kill your self love reflex. Even people with self destructive tendency tend to do things that feel good to their bodies. A drug addict gets high and it damages their body, but it also pleasure the body. They may ignore their needs more, but they still have a reflex to eat and sleep, just not as much.

    "How can you love your body when you don't feel loved."
    1. Love is an action not always felt
    2. The body innately loves itself
    3. Love is a reflex of your body & soul
    4. Even when hate is present the love reflex still exist.

    Great Post! Thank you Avatar. Thank you B&Q.

  15. You must learn how to pamper and take care of yourself, and continue to do this daily. Forget about what others think.